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Wife doesnt like the road
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Posted on Tue, Mar 28, 2006 13:14

Ok i have begged my wife of 2 years to take to the road with me on my Harley(my true love)..She just refuses and doesnt understand the pull.yea I know i was stupid to marry someone that doesnt have the urge,but i did and now look at me!! What about a friend female riding partner.??There is just nothing like sharing a day or week with someone who enjoys riding ,camping and all the fun things that come along with biking.I am going crazy ..need advice!!I just dont want to give up that craving and love of sharing the road and the good times that go along with it..!!



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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 20:13

Softail1999 write:
If your looking for people to ride with local.. Try joining your local hog chapter or any other local riding club.. Good place to meet riding buds close to you...

I look at it as a hobby and since she may have hobbies of her own, I cant see why you cant either... Ummmm.. Except this didnt work for me!!!! LOL... She got jealous of mine, even though she I taught her to ride and she had her own bike.. I was still having to ride with my friends alone most of the time.. LONG STORY... Could never figure it out.. Still cant... Thats why I wont settle for someone who doesnt enjoy riding, and wont be jealous of it...


When my wife and I met I did not ride then. I just started again last year. I don't know, maybe in time she will ride.

I will google local bike clubs and see what I can come up with. One other problem I have with finding partners is I work nights and I only ride early in the mornings. So it makes things tuff.



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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 19:33

xRGRULERx write:
Oh, ok. Was not aware of that man. I am sorry. :(

I was thinking today about the posts I made on this thread. I still don't see anything wrong with riding with woman if they are not on the same bike and your not traveling with them. It would be the same as riding with a guy. At least to me it would be.

I will however say I was wrong with the way I presented my views on this subject. For that, I am sorry.


SeminoleSlim:
that was my point exactly - don't make assumptions and judgements about people and things you have no knowledge of.

just be careful about jumping too quickly to conclusions and you be ok on here.

apology accepted.



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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 15:21

If your looking for people to ride with local.. Try joining your local hog chapter or any other local riding club.. Good place to meet riding buds close to you...

I look at it as a hobby and since she may have hobbies of her own, I cant see why you cant either... Ummmm.. Except this didnt work for me!!!! LOL... She got jealous of mine, even though she I taught her to ride and she had her own bike.. I was still having to ride with my friends alone most of the time.. LONG STORY... Could never figure it out.. Still cant... Thats why I wont settle for someone who doesnt enjoy riding, and wont be jealous of it...

  


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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 13:34

SeminoleSlim write:
Some people are in situations due to cirsumstances beyond their control. And you shouldn't make assumptions about things you know nothing about - or worse - make judgements based off those unfounded assumptions.

But, since you feel you must know, my wife died.


Oh, ok. Was not aware of that man. I am sorry. :(

I was thinking today about the posts I made on this thread. I still don't see anything wrong with riding with woman if they are not on the same bike and your not traveling with them. It would be the same as riding with a guy. At least to me it would be.

I will however say I was wrong with the way I presented my views on this subject. For that, I am sorry.



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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 12:56

Sem,
I thought your calm & unassuming advise to X was well said. Personally I found it helpful.
Also...I'm truly sorry about your wife. Hope you make friends here...won't take the place of a compainion, but it helps.

  


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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 07:43

Some people are in situations due to cirsumstances beyond their control. And you shouldn't make assumptions about things you know nothing about - or worse - make judgements based off those unfounded assumptions.

But, since you feel you must know, my wife died.



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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 05:17

xRGRULERx write:
I am married also. But I am looking for men, woman, couples, or groups. Don't really matter to me.

I understand about his wife not wanting to ride. I have the same problem. And it does when your attached to someone who don't like to ride or like motorcycles. But other then that I am happy with my wife. No one on this site could compare. :)

Also, just so all know, my wife knows I am registered here. We have been together for over 10 years. We trust each other and are honest to one another.

Now, as for asking guys, the only problem is when you start sending messages to guys on this site they think your gay or something.

I probably picked the wrong site to look for riding partners and such. Friends also, since it seems hard to make any here. I wish there was a website geared for just that. But I can't seem to find one.

There is another site I have been posting on. Perhaps I will find riding partners their. I just don't think this site is designed and geared for what I am looking for. But I will hang out till my subscription is over.


this site is a great one for friends---there are alot that are now couples and/or are openly married---the forums are the best place to get to know those in your area--also we have get togethers--yes some are looking--some came here looking and others are happy with self and if we find what you have we will cherish(sp) it

peace--and ride safe



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Posted on Thu, Mar 30, 2006 02:54

Softail1999 write:
xRGRULERx,
The comments may have been directed at a certain member, but the contents of it can be taken in general to single people. Me being one... And being an open forum, we leave yourself out for others to comment.. Hell at your age I was also on top of the world thinking everything was great.. Than one day it was over.(17yrs). Soo... Nothing is in stone nowadays.. As I see it.. And Im a nice person, mostly... lol...

As far as anyone judgeing of you, Ive not seen it here, nor am I in a position to do. I may have missed it or its no longer showing up here..

My points are brought up for discussion nothing more.

Just a thought here.. 99% of members are divorced/single.

PS.. BK has a problem with showing our posts.. It states you have posted in the forums 5-times.. BUT only 2 were actually showing up.. Soo this may be confusing members here too...


I missed this post. I did not see it earlier. I hear you. But I am done with this topic. This topic was dead before it even started. lol

You seem to make sense though and I respect that.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 20:37

Actually, I changed my mind. I don't want to know why you are single. In all truth I don't really care to be honest. Sorry if that sounds rude.

I think I am done with this topic. In closing though I have a few things left to say.

1st, I am not on the site looking for someone to be with. And if I was looking I dam sure as heck would not my hours posting on forums looking for love. I would get out and try to find someone.

2nd, people need to look at themselves and work on themselves before they are going to ever have a good relationship. Let's look at it this way. Look at your own profile. Become that person 1st before asking for someone like that. Now with that said, I am sure there are members here that match what they ask for in their profile.

3rd, like I said I am not taking any relationship advice from someone that is single. For me to hear what someone has to say they have to have a great marriage and have been married for some time. And as I stated. Taking advice from someone who is single is like taking financial advice from someone that is homeless. Or taking parenting advice from someone who don't have kids. Kinda stupid don't you think? If that makes you upset, so be it. I am not worried about it. In the end, you will see that I am right.

And as you told me, I wish you luck. You will need it.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 20:24

SeminoleSlim write:

xRGRULERx write:
SeminoleSlim write:
we all make decisions in life that we wish were different. however, you DID make a vow (several) to your wife when you got married. those vows should come before anything else you do. you are only as good as your word. my advice, find something she really likes and join her in it and ask for nothing in return. give it some time. then just ask her to give the road a try with you. in other words, you have to give something to get something... and sometimes you may not get it then.

marriage is a compromise and you can't be selfish about it. stay away from the other women! ride with the guys and put the marriage FIRST.

hope it works out for you... that's my fiddy cents.


Selfish? No. I let her do things she wants to do with no word about it. I don't question anything she does. Reason? Because we have been together a long time. She has respect from me.

If you truly were the person as you type your words to be you would not be single. So please don't try to act so nice. Will not work with me. :)

Maybe I am the one that should be giving advice here. I am not single and not looking for anyone. And I am married.

But hey, I suppose people are single for a reason.

It's all good though. A good refresher where I used to be 11 years ago.

And I am not going to listen to advice on relationships from someone that is single. Sorry, that is like taking financial advice from a homeless person. Makes absolutely no sense.



if this is an example of your attitude, no wonder she doesn't want to ride with you on your bike. she probably doesn't care too much about a car trip either.

you have no idea why i am single so your comments clearly show, even more, why you ride alone... good luck. you're gonna need it.


Ok, explain why you are single then.

And it is not an attitude. It is the truth. Sorry you disagree.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 17:43

xRGRULERx write:
SeminoleSlim write:
we all make decisions in life that we wish were different. however, you DID make a vow (several) to your wife when you got married. those vows should come before anything else you do. you are only as good as your word. my advice, find something she really likes and join her in it and ask for nothing in return. give it some time. then just ask her to give the road a try with you. in other words, you have to give something to get something... and sometimes you may not get it then.

marriage is a compromise and you can't be selfish about it. stay away from the other women! ride with the guys and put the marriage FIRST.

hope it works out for you... that's my fiddy cents.


Selfish? No. I let her do things she wants to do with no word about it. I don't question anything she does. Reason? Because we have been together a long time. She has respect from me.

If you truly were the person as you type your words to be you would not be single. So please don't try to act so nice. Will not work with me. :)

Maybe I am the one that should be giving advice here. I am not single and not looking for anyone. And I am married.

But hey, I suppose people are single for a reason.

It's all good though. A good refresher where I used to be 11 years ago.

And I am not going to listen to advice on relationships from someone that is single. Sorry, that is like taking financial advice from a homeless person. Makes absolutely no sense.


if this is an example of your attitude, no wonder she doesn't want to ride with you on your bike. she probably doesn't care too much about a car trip either.

you have no idea why i am single so your comments clearly show, even more, why you ride alone... good luck. you're gonna need it.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 17:20

xRGRULERx,
The comments may have been directed at a certain member, but the contents of it can be taken in general to single people. Me being one... And being an open forum, we leave yourself out for others to comment.. Hell at your age I was also on top of the world thinking everything was great.. Than one day it was over.(17yrs). Soo... Nothing is in stone nowadays.. As I see it.. And Im a nice person, mostly... lol...

As far as anyone judgeing of you, Ive not seen it here, nor am I in a position to do. I may have missed it or its no longer showing up here..

My points are brought up for discussion nothing more.

Just a thought here.. 99% of members are divorced/single.

PS.. BK has a problem with showing our posts.. It states you have posted in the forums 5-times.. BUT only 2 were actually showing up.. Soo this may be confusing members here too...

  


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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 09:57

Softail1999 write:

xRGRULERx write:

SeminoleSlim write:
we all make decisions in life that we wish were different. however, you DID make a vow (several) to your wife when you got married. those vows should come before anything else you do. you are only as good as your word. my advice, find something she really likes and join her in it and ask for nothing in return. give it some time. then just ask her to give the road a try with you. in other words, you have to give something to get something... and sometimes you may not get it then.

marriage is a compromise and you can't be selfish about it. stay away from the other women! ride with the guys and put the marriage FIRST.

hope it works out for you... that's my fiddy cents.



Selfish? No. I let her do things she wants to do with no word about it. I don't question anything she does. Reason? Because we have been together a long time. She has respect from me.

If you truly were the person as you type your words to be you would not be single. So please don't try to act so nice. Will not work with me. :)

Maybe I am the one that should be giving advice here. I am not single and not looking for anyone. And I am married.

But hey, I suppose people are single for a reason.

It's all good though. A good refresher where I used to be 11 years ago.

And I am not going to listen to advice on relationships from someone that is single. Sorry, that is like taking financial advice from a homeless person. Makes absolutely no sense.

Sooo.. Only mean people are divorced now? Interesting concept here...

Seriously doesnt make sense to judge others you have no knowledge of.... Not a good start for good friendships..


I agree. Your right. However, I am being judged. So, it is ok for others to judge me but not ok for me to judge others? So do you call that a start of a good friendship? I sure as hell don't.

And my remarks were for him and him only. Just to clarify that.

Heck, I am not even the one who started this thread to begin with. lol And I am not taking up for the person that did. Clearly him and I are after two different things. And if members can't see that there is a problem already as far as any kind of friendship goes. Male or female.

Your point is better well taken then the other guy. Just so you know. You did recognize that I placed a judgment on him. But your failing to see the judgments placed on me. Which makes me think you may lean more to what you think others think is right. But that is just my take on it. I could be wrong though. Not the 1st time.

But you don't seem like a bad guy to me. Just so you don't take my post the wrong way. I thought I would mention that.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 09:25

xRGRULERx write:

SeminoleSlim write:
we all make decisions in life that we wish were different. however, you DID make a vow (several) to your wife when you got married. those vows should come before anything else you do. you are only as good as your word. my advice, find something she really likes and join her in it and ask for nothing in return. give it some time. then just ask her to give the road a try with you. in other words, you have to give something to get something... and sometimes you may not get it then.

marriage is a compromise and you can't be selfish about it. stay away from the other women! ride with the guys and put the marriage FIRST.

hope it works out for you... that's my fiddy cents.



Selfish? No. I let her do things she wants to do with no word about it. I don't question anything she does. Reason? Because we have been together a long time. She has respect from me.

If you truly were the person as you type your words to be you would not be single. So please don't try to act so nice. Will not work with me. :)

Maybe I am the one that should be giving advice here. I am not single and not looking for anyone. And I am married.

But hey, I suppose people are single for a reason.

It's all good though. A good refresher where I used to be 11 years ago.

And I am not going to listen to advice on relationships from someone that is single. Sorry, that is like taking financial advice from a homeless person. Makes absolutely no sense.

Sooo.. Only mean people are divorced now? Interesting concept here...

Seriously doesnt make sense to judge others you have no knowledge of.... Not a good start for good friendships..

  


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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 08:31

SeminoleSlim write:
we all make decisions in life that we wish were different. however, you DID make a vow (several) to your wife when you got married. those vows should come before anything else you do. you are only as good as your word. my advice, find something she really likes and join her in it and ask for nothing in return. give it some time. then just ask her to give the road a try with you. in other words, you have to give something to get something... and sometimes you may not get it then.

marriage is a compromise and you can't be selfish about it. stay away from the other women! ride with the guys and put the marriage FIRST.

hope it works out for you... that's my fiddy cents.


Selfish? No. I let her do things she wants to do with no word about it. I don't question anything she does. Reason? Because we have been together a long time. She has respect from me.

If you truly were the person as you type your words to be you would not be single. So please don't try to act so nice. Will not work with me. :)

Maybe I am the one that should be giving advice here. I am not single and not looking for anyone. And I am married.

But hey, I suppose people are single for a reason.

It's all good though. A good refresher where I used to be 11 years ago.

And I am not going to listen to advice on relationships from someone that is single. Sorry, that is like taking financial advice from a homeless person. Makes absolutely no sense.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 08:29

I disagree. If they don't ride on the back what is the difference between riding with a man or a woman? If they ride on the back or you travel with them that is different. It is more what someones intentions are. Not necessarily what you are doing. Such as going for a bike ride for a few hours. Basically your saying that I can't have friends that are woman. If I ride with friends that are guys then why can I not ride with female friends? On separate bikes of course. At least in my opinion.

However, I will take your post in to consideration and think about it more.

I never did think about getting her signed up with a class. You make a good point there. I will try that and see if that idea works. If my wife would ride on the bike with me or even separately that would be great. I would not need any partners then. lol

However, I will say if there are such jelously issues here with members then how can you ever trust anyone? But yet, all want trust in return.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 07:34

One Question have you talked to your wife about riding with another woman? If she is cool with you leaving her home while you have another woman with you she is very loving and trusting. I wish you the best for what ever happens and remember a man is only as good as his word.



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 06:13

Heretic write:
sounds like a good excuse to build a clean looking solo chopper


there ya go! i agree with Heretic!



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Posted on Wed, Mar 29, 2006 05:51

we all make decisions in life that we wish were different. however, you DID make a vow (several) to your wife when you got married. those vows should come before anything else you do. you are only as good as your word. my advice, find something she really likes and join her in it and ask for nothing in return. give it some time. then just ask her to give the road a try with you. in other words, you have to give something to get something... and sometimes you may not get it then.

marriage is a compromise and you can't be selfish about it. stay away from the other women! ride with the guys and put the marriage FIRST.

hope it works out for you... that's my fiddy cents.



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