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HAHAHA HOW TO SHOWER!!!!! LMAO
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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 19:25

How to shower like a Woman:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long
dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43
added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
with real passion fruit. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub
for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body
wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

Sh*ave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower and stand on bathmat.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on
head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


How To Shower Like a Man:


Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the
'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of
your wiener and scratch your as*s.

Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fa*rt and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your bu*tt, leaving those coarse bu*tt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat.

Dry off forearms and bu*tt only.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of
tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly off.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
'woo-woo' sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
there is something so very wrong with you.

(SHEESH ALL THE WORDS I HAD TO EDIT)
*=WORDS I HAD TO EDIT.. LOL

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 18:12

Oh Yeahhhhh...........PBG, that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time!!! Lmao!!! Thanks sister!
HarleyBlueEyes

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 16:27

that was some funny snit lmao.. Only one thing tho, woo woo is not the sound I make.... So there

Chkn

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 12:30

Bigbear2000 write:
Once after i was first married, I'm in the shower and the wife was watchin the tv, when i start getting "ideas".
Hopped out of the shower, threw open the door and leaped into the livingroom, yelling "Look what I got for you!" The neighbor lady sitting on the couch thought that was quite funny.
Amazing how quickly "ideas" leave your head.


Probably the best time the neighbor lady had!

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 11:49

so thats what ya all are doin in there



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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 10:26

OK Princess
I tried it your way cost me $65 for all that stuff and after all said and done I smelled like a dam fruit basket. Had to go roll around in the grass to get rid of it and i still needed to blow my nose....

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 06:33

PBG
that is funny--buttttttttttttt not how i take a shower
guess i'm a nudist at heart

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 06:31

Bigbear2000 write:
Once after i was first married, I'm in the shower and the wife was watchin the tv, when i start getting "ideas".
Hopped out of the shower, threw open the door and leaped into the livingroom, yelling "Look what I got for you!" The neighbor lady sitting on the couch thought that was quite funny.
Amazing how quickly "ideas" leave your head.

  


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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 06:20

Once after i was first married, I'm in the shower and the wife was watchin the tv, when i start getting "ideas".
Hopped out of the shower, threw open the door and leaped into the livingroom, yelling "Look what I got for you!" The neighbor lady sitting on the couch thought that was quite funny.
Amazing how quickly "ideas" leave your head.



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Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 06:03

PRINCESS....ROTFLMAO.....TOO FUNNY, AND SO TRUE...............



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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 19:59

PrincessBabyGirl write:

slowride2000 write:
soooooooo Your Point is....
You girls wast to much water....lol

LMAO Nooooooooo the point is YOU GUYS NEED TO LEARN FROM US.. As a matter of fact Im gonna get in the SHOWER now.. lol Ill let you know what happens.. lmmfao!!!

Yeaaaaaaaaa JJ isnt that a cute one.. Someone just emailed that to me I thought we needed a little lift in the threads,.. Love ya Girlie Girl.. PEACE OUT PRINCESS......

Princess do me a favor when ya get out the shower write me a play by play on all the detalls....
I can use all the pointers I can get....

  


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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 19:52

slowride2000 write:
soooooooo Your Point is....
You girls wast to much water....lol

LMAO Nooooooooo the point is YOU GUYS NEED TO LEARN FROM US.. As a matter of fact Im gonna get in the SHOWER now.. lol Ill let you know what happens.. lmmfao!!!

Yeaaaaaaaaa JJ isnt that a cute one.. Someone just emailed that to me I thought we needed a little lift in the threads,.. Love ya Girlie Girl.. PEACE OUT PRINCESS......

  


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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 19:45

soooooooo Your Point is....
You girls wast to much water....lol



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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 19:41

OMGosh PBG..ROFLMFAO I just about choked on my drink reading this.. How true this is....

  


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