Does Not Drinking interfere with dating? Relationship

  • View author's info Author posted on Oct 09, 2006 09:13

    Since I have been back into dating and have not drank for 8 years, it seems that most women do not want to date a man that does not drink. I see a lot of the profiles that say for drinking preference:

    drinks socially


    drinks regularly

    but then they will say no Druggies or Drunks. Why is it such a big deal to not drink? You must drink to date them but not be a drunk. I am confused
    I went out on a date this past weekend and everything was going great until she suggested we go to her local hangout and have a drink. I am okay with going to bars but it seemed to change the mood as soon as I ordered a coke and told her that I don?t drink. I was pretty sure she would not answer my calls again and I was right. She has not taken any of my calls.
    Should I start drinking again so I can date or should I just accept being single for the rest of my life?
  • 10Comments

  • View author's info posted on Mar 31, 2012 18:00

    brother don,t start drink,n for a woman ,, man thats your soberity my bro,I,m in the same boat friend, if they don't get,it then see-ya, real men face there issues and take control ,,we did that bro,,dont fall down my friend

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  • View author's info posted on Dec 16, 2009 01:25

    After seeing what a drunk dose to a family, I personally dont drink and drive. But if I have some one driving then yes ill have 1 or 2, but getting sloppy drunk (Vomiting) is not a fun time for me. But contantly driving someone else always hammered is not fun either.

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  • View author's info posted on May 07, 2009 03:15

    Hello and just so you know. I really appreciate someone who has moved on in their life from needing mood altering chemicals to be content. My take on this, is be yourself. You don't need somone who is that shallow. KJS-Montana

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  • View author's info posted on Oct 28, 2008 04:39

    I don't mind the person who will have a drink with dinner. I just prefer not to drink. Even on the poker runs I take off and get through them early to miss the ones who think they can't finish one without a couple of drinks at each stop.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 27, 2008 16:02

    hi well i dont drink, havnt drank for a long time. i dont care what people say, i been there done lookin for a guy who dont drink, & preferably dont smoke. needle in a hay stak. anyway, just wanted to let you know, no there is nothing wrong with not drinking. its to be honored.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 06, 2008 23:04

    I have heard it bothers some people to date a sober person. I never understood that! I love hanging out with my sober buddies...Why shouldn't they enjoy live music, the bustle of locals, and, when things are really awesome at the venue, dancing...That stuff is not for "drinkers only" Maybe you ought to be the one to initiate the drinking by saying, "Hey, ya want to go out clubbin' this weekend? I'll be the designated driver...We can even take the bike if you want. I'm sober, so it won't be a problem." Maybe you are the one starting the awkwardness when you introduce your sobriety, because the uncomfortable air is projected by you, since you expect rejection and a negative reaction, so that is how your posturing and voice reflect it. Never met you..... just a possibilty. I know I have encountered that in the past...If I was anyone other than me, I might not think to say, "Awesome!!! Now I have a 'desi'!!! When do ya wanna go out?!"
    Be creative, one could ride wineries two-up, and there would be the closeness, wind, and confidence that the man holding the handle bars was not intoxicated. (You don't do other drugs do you?) Go to a costume party, New Years party, or football game. Drinks are safe when only one is drinking...and it's bound to be fun. That is, "fun" if you are truly relaxed, comfortable, and not a frowning "drink counter".....If you don't make people feel uncomfortable, they won't be! If anyone asks, just make light and say, "I'm allergic to alcohol...I break out in handcuffs!".
    Sorry to be so long winded...but I've only felt uncomfortable drinking around a sober friend if they have an unrelaxed that case, they are not comfortable enough with their sobriety to feel comfortable watching someone else drink. Not without seeing something they don't want to see. In that case, if someone wants to date someone they can go "party" with...the tense one would not be first, or tenth pick. So be honest with yourself when you replay the "hidden video" in your mind...Critique your approach, posture, voice, and level of relaxation, your ability to segue into engaging conversation, without an awkward stall in the none drinking department...or a rapid, weird scurry. Hold up a mental score card as you replay it to yourself. How would you as viewer have felt about the "scene". (Mental olympics, if you will.)
    Anyway, I hope that helps.

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  • View author's info posted on Sep 28, 2008 15:13

    Well you are one of the many out here who does not drink.

    For some saying that you are a non-drinker signals that you are an AA members who has a drinking problem.

    Women with bad past experiences with alcoholics avoid ppl who don't drink.
    Its the once bit twice shy thing...

    For the others out here who don't drink - its a personal choice or they have a medical condition that prohibits drinking.

    One has to look at the bigger picture...

    If they choose not to call you - well thats thier perogative. Keep searching you will find someone.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 20, 2006 16:15

    There are lots of folks..both men and women...who either don't drink at all or that it doesn't matter one way or the other to them. I like a beer or glass of wine but if I am with someone who doesn't drink at all it sure isn't an issue not too. Isn't that actually one of the small things in life? Good luck and don't give up just because you found out early where it really was at.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 11, 2006 08:55

    Roxie0215 write:
    I prefer a non smoker, non drinker guy.
    No stinky kisses or irregular behavior.


    Looks like there are women out there that prefer non drinkers. That is good news to hear! Looks like you found somebody according to your profile. Congratulations!
  • View author's info posted on Oct 11, 2006 08:49

    FLBiker714 write:
    Dude...chill. If you don't drink...don't drink. It leaves more for the rest of us. Find a woman who doesn't drink...they're out there. Nothing says you have to drink to date. Swallow yes...but not drink. LOL

    Thanks for the comment but finding a woman that does not drink or prefers somebody that does not drink is like looking for a needle in a hay stack. I guess I will just keep on searching!
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