I was reading the success stories..and If a guy said he was INLOVE with me,or LOVED me in a relationship even if we were dating a year..Id run for the hills..fast..

Id rather be friends first and build something that would last..what do all you ladies think?

I dont really beleive in soulmates,forgive me for saying such a thing..but something like that would scare me to death..

My cat was my soulmate, no pun intended,But so true..Ive been inlove 2 times in my life..and cant take the risk of falling inlove just for it to go bad..whats ur thoughts?

Springer Soul said:I wish you peace and softness.
~~~~~~~~

That sums up what I feel and what I would wish for you. I also hope you can feel these things while being loved and loving another.

DD

Thanks Nodey,
Ur so right!

You know you're always loved!!!

Love is not meant to be all pleasure.


For even as love crowns you,so shall he crucify you.
Even as he is for your growth,so is he for your pruning.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor.
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh,but not all of your laughter,and weep,but not all of your tears.

That's one of my personal favorites,and I try to remember this when i'm feeling low. It puts things into perspective for me.

None of us are guaranteed anything when we come into this world.

I feel that,what little time I have on this earth, if I am not ever loved,at least I was allowed to love.

Thanks Marie,Knots and Mojo..what wonderful advice..and its so appreciated..
-ArmyD

Ya got it Eye.......I seek/if by chance/get lucky......for my soul mate it gives me a quest or direction in life......I enjoy the single life most of the time....I came to terms that I will probably die a.....single~old~cripple~biker~basterd..but till then..gotta love life

I hope this doesn't come off as cynical, it's just the best way I can explain the feeling.

LOVE = VULNERABILITY!

I dont think you can have one without the other. Sometimes its tough to place your trust in others, just be watchfull, and surely don't give up.

There are good guys everywhere. Some right under your nose. It just takes time to see them for who they are sometimes.

Hope you find what you are looking for.

-Knots

Okay..
I'm going to dip my toe into this one..

Army Daughter~*

You are 20 years ahead of me.. But I know how it feels to be broken hearted to a point where you wish you could just run to the hills and build a new life there free from pain, lies, and deception.

Let me just tell you a little about myself..
I'm a 20 year old college student majoring in art and business. Art is my passion and I hope to change people lives through it some day..
Like you, I was raised by adopted parents. My parents are actually my great aunt and uncle, but none-the-less, they are my parents. They had 2 kids, 2 boys, giving me 2 brother to grow with. They tried to treat us equally, but there were always difficult times explaining myself when I was younger.. In a sense, not growing up with my biological parents made moments in my life hard and over time I developed an insecurity that hindered my personality development.. Not knowing, in a sense, how to love myself and in the end being afraid to love others.. Maybe you ride on the same boat here? Because I have a void and I don't understand it, it caused me to jump into one bad relationship after the other, and in the end breaking my heart, because I long so much for an understanding and someone to fill that void... Searching for a love my parents couldn't give me and trying to find that "Utopia" with a man... It just made it worst and I would fall into deep depression states. What I decided was the best thing I could ever do for myself was... I seeked out to talk to a Psychologist. She REALLY helped me figure out some things going on in my head and in my heart... Maybe you should consider it. And don't be afraid!! Don't think.. Oh my gosh! A shrink! People are going to think I'm nuts!! Cus I was the same way.. But you'll be surprised how many people actually see a Psychologists or a Psychiatrist.. Now there is a difference.. And if you want to know more details, just email me.
Young or old.. We've all been there. Maybe not as severe as others, and some people are stronger and some need more time to get over a breakup. being afraid to fall in love is okay.. That's what makes it so exciting! But isolating yourself will only make more issues that are not there.

Void is where love knows no foe and crimson thoughts of passion flow..

My words from one of my poems..
Make your void full with love and passion, but don't let your void take away the good times you're missing out on.

I hope I can be of some help. If you'd like some more advice, write me and I will enjoy telling you what I know, learned, and accomplish.

Tell then..
Much Love.

.+**+.Marie.+**+.

Thanks for everyones input and advice..all of ya'all are awesome..!

Got to go with Eye on this one. A Soulmate makes for good reading in in RIchard S. Bach books.

And yes, some people have truly found them... and some have lost them.

But, a soulmate would necessarily mean someone that is perfect for you in all regards? Or, someone that feels the same you do on all things?

Perhaps it is an unattainable standard. People meet. People talk. People share. People care. People do alot of other things together that people do together.

Over time, peoples souls may touch and grow together. So, is a "Soulmate" someone you wait for? Someone you stumble on? Or, at least in my take on it... something someone becomes.

If it is a metamorphesis... or a process. Having that standard that no one rightly fits may in fact rob you of that diamond in the rough that shines into your heart and soul over time. Then again, over time, you could just grow to hate them too I guess.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Nothing gained nothing lost. Nothing lost, nothing missed. Nothing missed nothing cherished. Nothing cherished nothing appreciated.... wait ... nothing appreciated!!! Get yer azz out of my house!

Different strokes for different folks Eye. It's what makes the world go around.
Truthfully,I like things just the way they are. I like my space and being able to answer only to myself. But do I want to be this way forever? Nahhhhhhhhh. Am I going to be with just anyone to keep from growing old alone? Nope.
But maybe someday I'll find someone who makes me smile a diffrent kind of smile. Someone I can call my own special friend, who I won't mind a*t all to share my world with.

I am not seeking a soulmate @ this time. I'm enjoying life as it comes and trying my darndest to make the best of the worst.

If by chance I meet someone who I feel is my soulmate, then I'll take it from there. But until then, I'm happy with all the friends, close friends, and best friends that I'm making along the way.

I understand exactly what you mean, Eye. The longer I'm single, the more I learn about me, and the more I know what I want out of life.

Why does anyone have to seek a soulmate? What's wrong, really, with being single and having good friendships?

Hey, the longer I am single the more I am starting to realize that I actualy LIKE it. Not just as an excuse for not being in a relationship, but sink me, I really do like it.

It is better to have loved and lost, than to have not loved a t all

Not my quote of course, but I believe it to discribe what Seeme is saying here. We have to risk love in order to live more fully. With out that risk what are we living for?

Thanx Jules...you seem like a great person!

Well said Roxie and I agree 100% my heart has been smushed and tossed aside like you Weenie but I know the person I am meant to be with is out there. Roxie hope things work out for you as well

I too, was leary of opening my heart again to someone...but if you close your heart to keep from being hurt again, you also close it to keep from being loved again. The time of healing is different for everyone. I am 42 and have found someone wonderful just recently...time will tell if it's meant to be

Seeme, SSoul and Char,

Ya'll are so right. I have honestly truly loved one man in my life and sad to say it wasn't my husband, I thought I did but so much went sour after being married for six months, I tried though, I was brought up to never give up without a fight and by then I was pregnant, I finally gave up when my son was 6 years old, I was being a single parent then and felt I might as well actually be one. It was the one after that, that took my breath away. I was 36 years old and for the first time in my life was so in love. I gave myself completely only to have it smushed, ripped apart and tossed aside. I delt with all this and I am not giving up. I know in my heart that one day I will find a man who loves me and wants to share his life with me. If we don't get out there and test the waters we will never know just how refreshing they can be. I know my heart may get broken again.....or it might not.


PS - Jade....love that picture g/f

Thanks beautitudes,Carolina girl, and softail..Ya'all have a great week!