Biker Blogs > SwtFLLdy's blogs > Walmart has everything
Walmart has everything Sort by:
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SwtFLLdy
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Posted on Sun, Mar 02, 2008 10:40

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, 'My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor.' 'Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,' Mike replies. 'There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a doctor.' So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: 'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.' That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better! Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart


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CinnamonGirlOH
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Posted on Mon, Mar 10, 2008 18:31

The Xrays for my neck came back fine, all my hardware is still in place and holding up well... my back had me down most of last week, but I'm feeling much better now, thanks. No more falling off ladders for me, that's the last one I swear! (as Cinny has to admit she shocked herself doing an installation today..just woke me up a bit..) You guys never did drunk dial me after the play! I waited, had the beer and pain killers ready so I could be on the same wavelength as you gals! I've been busy studying for my GED,working,spending time with my son who is home on spring break, volunteering at the animal shelter, etc. I'll leave the etc. up to your imagination! Let's just say, life is pretty damn sweet here! I'll come back to play, it looks like everybody here is playing nice for the moment, that's good to see!


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CinnamonGirlOH
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Posted on Mon, Mar 10, 2008 14:57

Walmart does indeed have everything....including one totally smokin' hot, Harley riding store mgr. that I am kinda partial too! You CAN find the best things at Walmart, if ya know wheree to look... :>)


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havfun
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Posted on Thu, Mar 06, 2008 18:19

Quoting: Originally posted by JerseyAngel OMG that is toooo funny!!

Man, what a great website! thanks to ya'll i know why my elbow hurts..


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cruisineasy1
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Posted on Tue, Mar 04, 2008 16:44

that is really good.LOL


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TreasureTheHobo
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Posted on Mon, Mar 03, 2008 11:05

LOLOLOL!!!


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JerseyAngel
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Posted on Mon, Mar 03, 2008 07:58

OMG that is toooo funny!!


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milfmom
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Posted on Mon, Mar 03, 2008 06:37

I have read this before but still funny...LMAO


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suburbansweetheart
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Posted on Mon, Mar 03, 2008 06:02

Now thats a pretty cool machine..


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irishpatti
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Posted on Sun, Mar 02, 2008 20:14

LMAO!


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