Biker Blogs > XENA18's blogs > LADIES! DO MEN REALLY WANT AN IDEPENDENT WOMAN?? NOOOT!!
LADIES! DO MEN REALLY WANT AN IDEPENDENT WOMAN?? NOOOT!! Sort by:
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Posted on Thu, Feb 15, 2007 14:01

My male friends, yes I have them, all platonic. have often told me to try and be a bit needy. Just a bit. Well, I didn't listen to my doctor and decided to lay down on the couch,instead of always sitting in the chair.I rang 4 of my buds before calling my son. Seems everybody was too busy to come help me get out of the couch. Of course, my son was laughing so hard he was very little help. There are lots of things I could use some help doing till I have fully recovered. But, I will never again ask.


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XENA18
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Posted on Wed, Feb 14, 2007 14:40

HEY CRUISIN'!!! THANK U!!! COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF!! "SHE KNOWS HER OWN WORTH"....GIRL, ABSO-FREAKIN'-LUTELY!!! THAT BLEW ME AWAY...AND IT SOOOOO IS NOT ABOUT 'CHIPS ON SHOULDERS' OR NONE OF THAT ....IT IS ABOUT KNOWING MY OWN WORTH AND KNOWING WHAT I WANT!! THANKS 4 HITTING THE NAIL ON THE HEAD! U GO GIRL!!! :)


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Posted on Sat, Feb 10, 2007 21:16

OK Deuce darlin... I know your suggestions will be just delightful!!! Let's hear it!


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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 22:54

As always Treas,I adore how you think, and how you always say it the best!!


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suburbansweetheart
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 22:24

Red and Crusin your absolutley right ... Women's roles have changed a lot in 30 years and It is confusing to all... But most of us have had to bring home the bacon and fry it up in the pan ..and never never let him forget he's the man...lol


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DeucesWild2
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 21:37

Red... I can offer up a few suggestions.... Deuce


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cruisineasy1
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 13:30

Red, you have a good point... I shifted from being dependant to independant due being let down time and time again and my needs not getting met. The pro side of independence is you don't have to be so vulnerable....and there is a certain amount we need to do for ourselves anyway that others can't and shouldn't try to provide. Like you said , overkill is having a wall so high, no one can scale it to get to you, lack of trust..etc..largely due to unfinished emotional business. There has to be a healthy balance between the two...


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Heretic
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 11:24

I wish someone would send some of the independant women to this area. It seems that most of the women in my area are the needy, clingy, jealous types, and if you have a home, a car, and a job they all come running.


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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 08:49

Deuce, what are we gonna do with you darlin?


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DeucesWild2
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 08:36

Can I have one? That's all I want... I just can't handle the g/f baby sitting duty. Wait... make that two. Deuce


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HDCouple4U2NV
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 08:30

CW don't worry lots of men like the depandant needy woman fulfills some need they have. I always try to be approachable no one has a problem approaching me. I just try to help out too, ya know you buy this round I'll buy the next, or I may buy the gas in both bikes next time we fill up ya know. Don't want a man to feel like I'm using him for money (using him for sex is another blog).


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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 08:16

I believe the roles of men and women have changed so drastically (being on the same level in work, education, pay, etc.) that men and women are afraid to rely on one another for fear of being used, tossed aside, etc. And, although independence sounds great, both still desire a down to earth relationship but can't get comfortable enough to let it happen. It's a matter of "trust".


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FXDLrider
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Posted on Thu, Feb 08, 2007 06:35

Independent women ? I agree there are those with a chip on their shoulder that I didn't put there. It's sad to watch them. They say they don't need a man, they can do it themselves. When a good man comes along who would stand with a sword and fight Satan himself for them, they run the man off. In their effrort to be " Independent " and prove themselves to themself or whomever, they never know when to let a man protect them as Mother Nature intended. Perhaps they've never had that. I don't know. But I will pick up the sword and stand tall. I know a lot of men who will and do to. I'm tired of zero degrees and snow. I Need to ride my HOG !!! It was 38 degrees last month and I rode for the day... Ride safely everyone.


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LadynWaiting
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Posted on Wed, Feb 07, 2007 21:24

Never been married, just never met the right guy where we could jive. Don't do the co-dependant thing.


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Posted on Tue, Feb 06, 2007 07:51

If she isn't very independant, we aren't gonna be together long


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cruisineasy1
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Posted on Tue, Feb 06, 2007 07:47

Great blog, Xena. Thought the same things myself...And it is wonderful to see men here commenting who have their heads on straight. IN my opinion..men that are comfortable with themselves;( namely good self esteem and secure with their own masculinity), are at the ones most at ease with an independent woman. To me, independence in a woman shows good mental health and strength of spirit..she is has gotten there by surviving the storms of life and bringing herself and her loved ones through. She loves fiercely, but expects respect for all that she is and can give to another in a relationship. She is knows her own worth. She also gives respect to others. She lives the values that she gives voice to.


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redsunset
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Posted on Tue, Feb 06, 2007 06:24

Treasure and Spyder....I agree with both of you. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am an extremely independent, strong woman....a take charge type of gal. But when I am in a relationship I know that it is very important to talk to my partner about things that will affect BOTH of us...whether it be a career move or a personal decision. I try to take that person's thoughts and concerns into consideration before making a decision...but in the longrun, as an independent woman, the decision is mine. So there is a balancing act with you and the other person. Communication is again the key to being who you are and still maintaning a healthy relationship.


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TreasureTheHobo
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Posted on Tue, Feb 06, 2007 06:16

Makes sense to me Spyder, no matter how independent anyone is, if you get into a relationship you are dependent on that other person for what their role is as your partner. People think nothing should change once a relationship is established but that is not realistic. Another person is in your life that you have made some type of vow or committment to. Therefore, things will be altered somewhat. It doesn't mean you have to give up your friends, etc. But it does mean you cannot just consider yourself, your time and your activities exclusively if you want that person and that relationship. No fee for this session.


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Posted on Tue, Feb 06, 2007 06:00

LTBB, How can I be of service Sweetheart?............ I have thought about this blog since it was posted trying to figure out what it is I want to say....da....One of my best friends is an independent woman. End of sentence. I don't think about it, that is just the way she is. She does not say I feel independent because she rides her own bike, or this, or that. She just is. LTBB, like you said you just are. So, what's my point..I know I'm independent, BUT, there is also a dependent part of me, which gets easily hooked. Tell me that makes sense to someone... Spyder


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suburbansweetheart
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Posted on Tue, Feb 06, 2007 00:27

The Best part of bring independent is that I can choose who I want to be with for all the right reasons.It's the damsel's in distress that choose men for what they have instead of who they are. I wouldn't mind being joined by the heart....lol An independent woman has so much to offer in thoughts and feelings and prefer their men to have an independent side as well.


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