Biker Blogs > Softailrick56's blogs > can u really find that someone in the cyberworld
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softailrick56
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Posted on Mon, Aug 07, 2006 13:08

first off thx for all the great comments i recieved from my last 2 blogs, now let me ask this one can u really find that someone special on this box, after u have been hurt so bad can u really trust again do u open urself up hoping that u don't get smacked down again ....even knowing that if u don't u will live a lonely life, i have so much to give that special someone(if ur thinking money forget it) that i have a feeling i am doomed to get hurt over and over again...and how do u tell someone that they don't do a thing for u nicely and not tromp on there feelings....since my first wife passsed on a couple of months ago and i've been separeted from this on for a while so much crap has been going thru my head, i do miss having a back seat and always feeing like the 5th wheel but most of my friend understand........i need a vacation.......lol live to ride and ride to live


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krishna
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Posted on Sat, Feb 26, 2011 10:28

it seems on here there's a lot of want to try but scared to or even willingness to try lots of exsuses too, what are people looking for, Im as honest as can be either tell me dont like what see or after date dont say your so cool we should do this again, then back right of what is wrong with this picture, guys complain oh woman not truthful well i have been off on here for 3 years now still same guys on here so whats up . two I know on here married and sickening my truth is if scared move on take addy down, don't play games if interested let us know If not say so its ok were all grown ups. baggage get rid of it before you put add up is all If nuts then I personally dont want to know you, good luck it isnt a proven fact it always works on here nine out of ten actually end up apart go for the fun of it and see where goes ,be careful but truthful.


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cruisineasy1
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Posted on Mon, Apr 09, 2007 22:04

I think we are talking to ourselves here...LOOK at the start date of this blog!..(Just noticed it.) He has probably moved on and is over it..LMAO...


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ohsusieq
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Posted on Mon, Apr 09, 2007 15:29

You just have to be open, honest and enjoy life. Its there,but with anything you have to be willing to take a chance. Red!!! you wondering what I am. where did all these good looking men come from. WooHoo G/F better let "T" know. Might want to see if the would like to join the BK productions James an AV we already know your goodlooking. XXXX


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Junie2006
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Posted on Mon, Apr 09, 2007 05:29

Good a place as any. If you go in a bar or public place you do not know who's who or what they are into. If you join a likeminded set at least you start with something important you ahve in common and you can check if anyone else knows this persona nd if they are kosher. Junie


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SpringerHD2000
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Posted on Sun, Apr 08, 2007 17:29

I believe you can find someone on-line. I have seen it happen. Unfortunately I have also seen it go bady. It really depends oh how honest each party is. This is a media in which you are limited only by your imagination. You can be anyone you want but so can the person on the other end. There are wonderful people to be found on the web but there are also those who would hurt and/or manipulate, intended or not. I wish ya the best...


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SpringerHD2000
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Posted on Sun, Apr 08, 2007 17:29

I believe you can find someone on-line. I have seen it happen. Unfortunately I have also seen it go bady. It really depends oh how honest each party is. This is a media in which you are limited only by your imagination. You can be anyone you want but so can the person on the other end. There are wonderful people to be found on the web but there are also those who would hurt and/or manipulate, intended or not. I wish ya the best...


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HDCouple4U2NV
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Posted on Sun, Apr 08, 2007 12:35

Better to have Loved and lost than never have loved at all. I live by that and as for finding my Mr. Right on the internet, well I have not even come close, only 3 real dates with one man and so far that has went no where. I think we have all become so causious because we have been used abused and hurt. I try not to hold past hurts against the man I seeing, can't make a new man in my life pay for something someone else did years ago. I feel we should always try new things and that is what this whole internet thing is to me something new.


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Posted on Sun, Apr 08, 2007 12:11

darlin, a wonderful surprise is around the corner for you....keep the faith! Hugs!


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Posted on Sun, Apr 08, 2007 11:06

My Kirk passed 11 years ago, I still mourn his loss, but on a different level, than at first. It took me four years before I could step outside my grief and look at life. Put yourself in a safe place and explore the feelings that your loss is bringing to you. This transends what others will percieve as normal and, what most will tell you to do. You need a grief counsellor and to be with others who know what you are going through.You are a 5th wheel and even your closest friends are at a loss as to what to say to you. They are in mourning with you and for you. Most importantly, bringing a woman into your life will only delay the grief process. It will come to life, again, and you will not have the skills to handle it. The relationship will suffer and disappear. Another loss. Oh, crap, I'm doing it again, sorry, I tend to run on and on. My own heart gets out of control and takes over my mind. Please seek out a qualified professional. The folks on these sites can be great, but you need more. Namaste.


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cruisineasy1
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Posted on Sat, Apr 07, 2007 23:26

Botarby, What you hve to say is pretty common with anyone that has loved hard and put time and effort into a relationship. Been there to after 23 years of marriage.BITTER AND anquish could have substituted for my name.But it passes.It does. I took time to learn about me for a while as it takes two to dance and there was things I had look at hard and change..that comes after the tide waters of hurt ebb back down below your head and heart and the blaming and anger subside a little too. And they will. Give it time. What you learn and choose to grow and change about yourself serves to make fertile ground for a healthier more vibrant relationship to grow. Let yourself breathe.....for awhile and heal.When the time is right, you will find another special person.


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bonnie1958
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Posted on Sat, Apr 07, 2007 21:41

Just be honest...that's all. That way NO ONE gets hurt. Don't say you're looking for a relationship when you haven't ended and never INTEND to end the one you're in....


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Botarby8s
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Posted on Fri, Aug 18, 2006 07:21

@ Russelmania - not gay at all. I know exactly what you mean. I want nothing more than to be in a loving relationship, but I don't think I'm better off having had it and lost it. Much like the old saying of how you make a child cry. To make a child cry, you don't refuse to give it candy... you give the child candy and then take it away. I fear saying this as I really don't want to open anyone's wounds or sound crass, but if my ex had died (and I don't wish that upon her) it would be different... easier to accept, although painful in a different way. However, she's out there living, breathing, and going on without me. It would even be easier to accept if I was abusive, a cheater, or irresponsible. But no... my biggest fault was working too much to support my family... and from HOME noless. It is the loss of the relationship WITH the rejection that makes it painful and lasting.. Better to have loved and lost... sure, if it was a mutual agreement or you were the one that said "See ya!" I know this all makes me sound bitter or down on women in general, but that is not the case. I don't hold a whole lot of stock in the masses, but there are good people out there... men and women. Personally I think you are one of those people I'd get along with just fine... and I hope that doesn't come across as "gay" either. Disclaimer: I also don't mean to offend any homosexuals out there. My viewpoint on homosexuality is much like my viewpoint on politics and religion... as long as you aren't trying to convert me, I'm good.


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Posted on Thu, Aug 17, 2006 23:47

@botarby well where do i go here having a discussion like this with a guy, people are going to think I'm sensitive or gay, neither of which are going to do me any good.... I would have agreed with you completely not too long ago. The fall from the heights when you're not expecting them is more painful and damaging than I could have ever imagined and leaves you with wounds that you have to let heal, and if you're lucky you will even come to appreciate your scars if you learn lessons from them. But sooner or later the healing will get to a point that you can think about those hieghts again without it being too painful and realize that your life is a LOT better when you care about someone more than yourself. When you choose to take the chance of letting someone close enough that they could rip you to shreds again, its scary as hell, but it makes you feel alive again. Hopefully i learned enough not to make as many mistakes and I wont get crushed again, because now I know how bad that pain is. Knowing that may be an advantage, because you will probably do a better job of avoiding it. We'll see.


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Posted on Thu, Aug 17, 2006 17:38

To know is nothing at all, but to imagine is everything!!


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james77075
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Posted on Sat, Aug 12, 2006 18:23

..can you really find someone in a bar..in a church..in the grocery store...yes to all of those and more...but you gotta be there to be found....they could be on the next isle...around the corner...sitting behind you...but got to turn around..look around..see who and what is around the next corner....you wont fine that special someone sittin at home..doors and window shut. you have to make a few mistakes to get it right ......


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Botarby8s
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Posted on Wed, Aug 09, 2006 12:09

@ goldofhart - I've heard that saying many times and I must say that for me, I don't agree. I would have rather been left alone to live my days in mediocrity than to have been given everything I'd ever wanted only to have it ripped away. No, for me to have loved and lost is in no way better than never having loved before.


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krishna
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Posted on Tue, Aug 08, 2006 17:07

softail If I was 20 yrs younger I would just have to give a hug every 5 minutes yu sound soo nice...


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Botarby8s
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Posted on Tue, Aug 08, 2006 13:26

Yes... and no. Yes, you can find that certain someone on here just as easy, or easier, than in the real world. Does that mean it is going to last? No. Unless two people dedicate themselves to one another and decide they're going to make it through hell and high water, it doesn't really matter where you find them... it isn't going to last. I find it interesting how "arranged" marriages in other cultures survive while our marriages are based on "mutual agreement" and the divorce rate is over 60%. Personally, I think you'd be better off picking someone online that you find interesting and with whom you can carry on a conversation. Then if you each find one another appealing physically, go for it. It can't be any worse than traditional methods. But alas, I'm most likely one of the LAST people from whom you should be seeking advice on relationships.


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michelle1966
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Posted on Tue, Aug 08, 2006 10:38

To answer your question.... Yes you can. I know from personal experience, but I have to say this: I came on her being completely honest. I am married (unhappily) wanting to make friends. Now.... I'm with a love I can live with, but I have found the one I can't live without.


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